Monday, March 8, 2010

Dead as a Rose Snail

....should become a new idiom. That's all I'm saying.

Well, folks, (Baila, you might want to stop reading now) I bought matzah today. Now, don't get alarmed. I haven't so much as picked up a vacuum cleaner or a couch cushion, so I'm not what you would call "ahead of schedule." But I happened to be at Shufersal, and they happened to have had their matzahs out. And I knew that the matzah is not going to be any "fresher" if I wait a week or two to buy it. Come now. They were all baked somewhere around Chanukah time and left to harden in their boxes, just like the matzahs of yore. (Judah Maccabee: "What the heck is this? I need some oil!" Shmueli, the Maccabee underling: "It's our matzah factory. Just preparing for the Pesach rush, sir.") So I picked up some matzah, and matzah meal while I was at it, and felt very accomplished, Pesach-wise. See, it's much easier to shop than to clean.

Also, I opened up our very useful Pesach documents. That also enables me to feel like I'm "doing" something without actually "doing" anything. So I have the master Pesach list opened, which is where we document our yearly (non-food) purchases, with notes of what we bought each year and what we need for the next year. I will give you two guesses which adult member of our family thought up this system. And let's just say that if it were left up to me, we'd probably end up with 35 soup bowls and no frying pan.

Our list is very useful. It contains helpful items such, as

"Purchased - salad bowl and thingies. Milchig silverware (crappy)" - Pesach 2001
"Buy cooling racks that won't bend!" - Pesach 2004
"Purchased - 3 tube pans. Next year buy ones that don't leak." - Pesach 2004
"Purchased - egg slicer (Donny doesn't like it)" - Pesach 2005
"No more cheese graters! We have 2!" - Pesach 2007
"Our seder plate broke!" - Pesach 2008 (This was very tragic.)
"Don't buy so much jelly! 2 or 3 is PLENTY!!" - Pesach 2009

So, as long as all you need for Pesach is a bunch of Word documents and some matzah, I am SO READY!!! Bring it on!

Donny, meanwhile, is doing his part for Pesach preparation by traveling to America for 12 days. Now, you might think this is, in fact, not so helpful, but he will be making a very important Pesach-related purchase while he is there: Kosher "Real" Salt. As you matzah-and-butter connoisseurs know, Real Salt is a crucial ingredient. And we have not been able to find it here. They have fine salt (too small), and super-sized, 'roid salt (too big), but not the Baby Bear of salt - the Kosher Salt. So while I am here (not) cleaning, Donny is on a mission to Find the Salt and bring it back.


Risa said...

I was in Target yesterday buying a pillowcase for the big one's school Pesach project and I saw boxes of Matzah and Kedem grape juice. I was kind of surprised and wonder if anyone else has seen such items in other Targets. (I also puchased some new toothbrushes while I was there, which made me feel "Pesach ready".)On another note, I am sorry about your chilazon. I guess you'll have to get the Techayles for Donny and Yaakov from another source.

mother in israel said...

Good point about the matza.

Your Pesach notes from 2001 make a nice historical record. You see, I got married before Y2K so I keep my notes in a written file, and throw out the list from the previous year.

Leah Goodman said...

I don't actually have notes. I just assume I have everything... Probably not the best plan now that I think of it. might be how we ended up with 2 unopened kettles at the beginning of last pesach... and I just remembered that we have a milchig pesach blender that's really nice!

Baila said...

Gila, I have the same kind of list from last year, and I think I'm going to totally steal your post and put mine up as well, because it's almost as funny as yours. But don't worry I'll say your post "inspired" mine and link you.

As for Pesach, today I plan on using on my 50 shekel coupon from Yesh in Kiryat Sefer to start buying some Pesach stuff.

LL said...

I bought Pesach food (potato chips, soda, etc.) on sale at Giant, and I feel all ready. Too bad the whole cleaning thing has not started. Oh well.

Gila Rose said...

risa - touche on the tchelet joke. I should consult you before I publish the posts.

Baila - steal away

Libby - we'll be dirty, but we won't be hungry!

kathleen said...

My only progress on the cleaning is to tell the kids they are not allowed to eat anything in the living room. Not much of a head start considering I have a bit more to do than that.

Gila Rose said...

Kathleen - good start! You should take a break now and get some ice cream.