Folks, I have some sad news. We have lost one of our Loyal Readers. It seems that bosses all over are "cracking down" and wanting their employees to "work" rather than read "Facebook updates" and "blogs."
I have heard numerous sad reports of Facebook - and even sadder - Blogspot being blocked at workplaces. And so it is that Cheryl, one of our first Loyal Readers and a frequent commentor, has left our ranks. If you recall, Cheryl often scolded me for not blogging often enough; she complained, "I need something to do at work all day!" Now that aliyahbyaccident cannot be a worktime distraction, it seems we have no place in Cheryl's life. ("Um, I might catch up occasionally on Saturday night," she says, "When I'm really bored. And the cable's down. And the phone is out. And all of my books are on really high shelves so I can't reach them. And my husband has decided to converse solely in Farsi. You know, then.")
So Cheryl we thank you for your year and a half of Loyal Readership. We are not at all insulted that you only viewed us as "somewhat more exciting than work" or that there is no place for us in your day-to-day life, perhaps in between learning Farsi. We wish you the best of luck.
However, we do ask that you return whatever aliyahbyaccident trinket you received upon declaring your Loyal Readership (I believe it was an official aliyahbyaccident skirt hanger.)
In other (happier) news, Ariella's mesibat siyum was "meuleh!" It was a loooooong program - it was called for 5:30 and we didn't return home until 7:30. I was very glad I did not decide to shlep Yaakov along, despite the presence of half his gan who had brothers/sisters in first grade. I would have spent two hours stuffing "vaflim" (Hebrew for wafers, not, as its name implies, for waffles) in his mouth in a desperate attempt to keep him quiet and allow me to watch the performance. He would have been a very, very "shamen" boy by the end of the evening.
The production was held at a local gym to accomodate the 125 kids, 250 parents, 100 grandparents, and 83 wafer-stuffed siblings. The first performance was a dance with all of the kids, followed by many, many speeches (Ariella warned me: "Mommy, there are going to be a lot of speeches. You are going to have to sit quietly and listen to them.") Then each class (there are 4) performed its own little dance number, followed by another full-grade performance. THEN there was the handing out of each. individual. siddur. And THEN they all opened their brand-new siddurim and sang adon olam. THEN we sang Ani Ma'amin, and THEN we went to collect the various haftaot waiting for us.
THEN we left, but THEN we got a phone call from a friend that we had forgotten to pick up the picture frame Ariella made, so we turned around, went back to pick it up, and THEN, finally, went home. Phew!
Despite the length, the production was really quite beautiful. The choreography was "meod" impressive and it was very sweet to see Ariella's face when she held her brand-new siddur.
(When we returned home, she started asking questions. "So, Mommy, is this the siddur YOU got at your mesibat siddur?" she asks, holding up the Artscroll siddur with "Riverdale Jewish Center Purim 5767" printed on it.
[Distress] "Well, do you still have your siddur that you got?"
"Um, of course, I'm sure it's at Bubby and Zaidy's somewhere." Note to Momz and Dadz: If this is not true, please go out and buy a blue siddur Shiloh and put my name on it.
"How come you don't use this siddur anymore?" she says, picking up my other Artscroll which has disintegrated and is missing crucial pages of Shemona Esrei.
"Um, well, it sort of fell apart."
[Crushed] "Is mine going to fall apart??????"
[Calmly and reassuringly.] "Don't worry, if it does, we can take it to a special store that fixes books."
Once that crisis had been averted, there was the inevitable crash that follows a week of such high excitement and anticipation. Why do we do all that work and it's only for one night!!! she wailed.
Luckily, the next day she was full-swing into the Purim activities at school; namely, the "shuk Purim," at which she purchased cotton candy, pizza, sour sticks, chips, and hot chocolate. As they say, "Mishenichnas Adar, Marbim B'Shoko."