Sunday, June 27, 2010

A Tale of Three Children

In no particular order, three stories for three kids:

In today’s segment of Games Kids Play
On Shabbat, I played War with Yaakov. First of all, you should all know that Yaakov knows almost all of his numbers! Progress!

We started playing, and I put out a king, and explained that king was the highest so I got to take his card. Well, Yaakov, ever the card shark, decided that if this was indeed the case, he should just play his two kings at every turn. So I put out a card, he put out his kings and took my card. This went on for a few minutes, as my card pile rapidly dwindled. What a great game! he thought. Then, he had an even better idea. “Why should I have to take out and put away my kings every time?” you can almost hear him thinking. “I’ll just leave out the kings, and then whatever card Mommy has, I’ll just take it!” So he sat there, letting his kings do the work, and every turn, he promptly whisked my poor pathetic cards away.

Now you sharp readers out there may have noticed something – Yaakov is blatantly cheating. But you even sharper readers may have noticed something else – Yaakov had only two kings. Which meant that someone else, namely me, had the other two, But somehow this didn’t faze Yaakov. When I put out my king, he shrugged said, “I’ll just take this also.”

Needless to say, Yaakov won.

Time to Learn a Third Language
Those of you who know Ariella know that she is very sensitive. She does not like to be talked about, she hates if we laugh or even smile when she does something cute or funny, and she’s even refused to read for Bubby and Zaidy “because they will laugh.” Even though we’ve explained that we are not laughing at her, we’re just very proud. She will have no smiling or laughing or even the tiniest hint of merriment.

So last week, when I wanted to share a funny Ariella story with Momz, I took the phone out to the mirpeset. The kids were zoned out in front of a movie. Suddenly, the door slides open, and I see Ariella standing there, hand on hip. “Why are you talking on the phone out here? ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ME?” Of course, I burst out laughing. Which didn't help the situation. So, as I said, time to learn a third language. Anyone up for some Inuktitut?

Things Babies Do
Now, just because we have a very cute baby in our lives, I'm not going to become one of those bloggers that blabs on and on about her baby's every move. "Oh look, he stretches!" (Which he does, very cutely.) Or, "He's starting to smile!" (Which he is. We think.) Or, "Look how he concentrates on his mobile! He's so focused!" (Also true.) So, you see, I will not regale you with every little Nadav story.

And I will certainly not be that mom that tells you gross anecdotes regarding bodily fluids. So, for example, I am not going to share with you what happened on Friday, when Donny, Nadav, and I were in a store, and I picked up Nadav because he was a little cranky and I noticed that his diaper was kinda full - again, I'm not going to say with what, because I'm a civilized person, so I'll just tell you it rhymes with "roop" - and then Donny looked over at me and noticed that this "roop" had gotten on my shirt, so I ran out of the store, holding Nadav at arm's length, Donny chasing after me, and we did an emergency change in the trunk of the car, using an entire package of wipes, and when he (Nadav) was finally cleaned and I was putting on his new onesie I noticed that this so-called "roop" had managed to get into his hair, and of course the wipes were used up, but luckily we had an elderly bottle of water rolling around the backseat so I gave Nadav an emergency sponge bath and then he was cleaned and much happier though I can't say the same for my shirt.

So I guess I have nothing to share with you about Nadav. Maybe next time.


Jonathan said...

Oh my Nadav had Croup ( all over himself. I didn't know babies could get that anymore. You should take him to the doctor. Unless you meant that Nadav had a loupe ( because he was assessing diamonds. Or he had a Stoup ( I can understand you not wanting you or you son to be baptized.

momzwifeofdadz said...

1000 poofahs to Jonathan for one of the best comments ever!

Kathleen said...

The emergency change in the trunk of the car...not so fun. Even worse when you find out your normal stash of wipes is gone.
The only problem with a third language is she'll figure out that when your speaking in it you're speaking about her.
Yaakov is quite the card shark isn't he?

OneTiredEma said...

Oh...this was the story you didn't get to tell me on shabbat.

Also: super impressed that the trunk of your car was available for diaper changes. Ours is crowded and sandy. Whenever I have to open it at the mall I think the guards must be wondering what on earth I do when I'm not at the mall...because it's not cleaning my trunk.

Gila Rose said...

Touche, Jonathan! That is Inukitut for, "Very very very funny comment, Jonathan!" (The Inukitut are known for their brevity.)

Kathleen, you raise a good point. Hmmm.....

Kate - the reason your trunk is dirty is because you are a good mother who takes her children outside, whereas I plop them in front of movies.

Shira said...

Well, we'll forgive you this time for not writing about poor little Nadav, but no excuses for next time! Roop stories are the best. I'm still snickering at your elderly bottle of water turned spronge bath. Genius.