Some of you may be familiar with Immigrant Parent. Some of you may even be Immigrant Parent.
Immigrant Parent asks your son's friend if he would "rotzah" something to drink.
Immigrant Parent understands only every other word that the teacher/ganenet is saying (and only every 3rd word if it's after 8:30 PM.)
Immigrant Parents' children have to teach them the classic kids' songs, instead of the other way around.
Well, Immigrant Parent struck with force today.
For about a week, Ariella has been telling me she needs a picture of "Amnon and Tamar." I brushed her off, not quite understanding, but today she tells me, "Mommy, tomorrow is 'partani' (enrichment class in school). I need to get a picture and do research today."
Now, I don't know about you, but where I was educated, we don't learn those stories in Tanach in which the characters might be viewed in an unfavorable light. For example, Rachav was, and always will be, an "innkeeper" and we just completely skipped from chapter 37 to 39 in Breishit. (I will give you all a second to check what was in chapter 38.)
So I was very surprised that Ariella was learning about the story of Amnon and Tamar. Especially since last week the topic in her class was bunnies. How did we jump from there to here? The connection seemed destined to lead me to some very weird places.
And I was even more surprised that her teacher was asking for a picture of this. Wow, she really does go to a progressive school, I thought.
Anyway, I sat her down and tried to explain the difficulty of this assignment. "Maybe your teacher meant Yehuda and Tamar?" I asked; though the story is equally as, um, delicate, at least it's in Breishit, which is what they're learning. "I mean, Amnon and Tamar is a story from Navi. And I'm not sure what your teacher means by getting a picture of it...."
"Mommy," Ariella explained patiently, "Amnon v'Tamar is a flower."